Bitte nicht storen

The steward asks me whether I wud like something to drink and proceeds to tell me the choices I have…milk, chocolate milk, cold drink, juice..i hesistanty ask…’whisky?’ and I’m given a weird look by the 2 guys sitting next to me. They had settled for orange juice. Anyway, its 4 am in India and I’m flying 650000 ft above ground at a speed of 650 km/h. The guy next to me starts a conversation. Seems they have a connecting flight from Frankfurt to Paris. Some sorta business meeting. My destination….Frankfurt.

I take out the earphones and plug it in..the in flight magazine says there’s a station completely dedicated to rock. Whisky and rock..seems like a good combination. Better then the movie atleast…its 27 dresses btw. I wake up around 9 30..the screen helpfully corrects me..its 6 am. I’ve reached germany. Will land in another couple of hrs. This guy ..Ashish..from my office comes to pick me up. I reach my hotel room my 9 30 (I’ve already set my watch 3.5 hrs behind). It’s a Sunday and everything is closed…and I mean everything. I go out in the evening to the adjacent park only to see a homeless bum speaking all my himself. The next day is a holiday too. So I have 2 days completely to myself. I roam arnd the streets to find any sign of life but it seems everybody wud rather shut themselves in than step out. This is how things are during holidays.

There are like 36 channels on TV..10 of which are Pay channels and the rest german. The only exception is CNN but I cant spend my entire day watching tht. Ohh even Mtv is kinda English. Atleast the music that they play is and also the all American reality shows which they have shitloads of. I check out to see if the pay channels are worth it. It turns out that the English movie channel has just 3 movies which they run in a continous cycle. “I am legend”, “The bucket list” and “Rambo 4” and the charge is 13 Euros..what a complete ripoff. I guess I’m not ready to pay that much just to see The bucket list being played every 9 hrs(I’ve already the seen the other 2..ohh and as I’m typing this whole thing, The bucket list is being shown…for the 3293918’th time). Also after 12 a few channels become an advertisement of sorts for porn and the likes. German’s have weird fetishes though…cos amongst the many ads tht adore the screen one particular ad was ‘hatke’. It seems u can order for porn wherein u wud find girls peeing…what kinda fetish is that anyways?? Office tom..have to leave the room early..I better hit the bed soon.

First day at office is pretty ok. This guy Stan who sits in the same room as I is hilarious and has a very colourful vocab. He’s the only American in the office and every sentence of his is punchuated with profanities. Ex: this French guy called maxime and stan are discussing a presentation…

Maxime (in a thick french accent) : This sentence should be in past continous ya?

Stan: I don’t fuckin know…I failed English back in school. I was too busy getting blowjobs back then.

I leave office arnd 5 30…have to go grocery shopping. Now being a novice I wud have a lil bit of trouble right. Well…as I go back and read that again I find it a gross understatement. I go through every alley of the supermarket to find out what I need to buy…but I dot fuckin know what to. Its difficult to distinguish one stuff from the other cos everything is in fuckin german. Even the helpful lil hints don’t do much good…100% pure “Reines Pflanzenol”. I mean what the fuck is that? Anyway, its vegetable oil..need that. After abt an hr and a half of roaming anrd..i finally get some stuff I can actually understand. I buy 12 lts of “Naturliches Mineralwasser”(seems like mineral water right)..i figure its gonna last me a long time. I come home and try to gulp down half of a bottle only to realize its carbonated. Ppl here have a thing for this kinda water and u’ll mostly find germans drinkin this instead of the normal water we drink. After that first sip I haven’t touched it again. Its still kept in my fridge eating up a lot of space.

Cooking to feed your self is a major hassle cos I’ve never done that bfor. But with quite a few hits and misses I’ve come to churn out a few things pretty decently. The good thing is..i haven’t messed up *totally* even once..which btw I thought I wud. The cute lil kitchen has almost everything I need. I tend to make something extra during dinner which I have the next day for lunch. That is what the other guys do too cos it seems like no matter where u go the canteen food has to suck.

Living like this has its advantages though. I can have beer with my food anytime I want…actually I can have beer ANYTIME I want. Although I limit tht to once a week. And how can I miss the fact tht European chicks are HOTTT…like full figured playboy playmates. I think I’m beginning to like this place.

Its been 2 weeks since I landed and I still have 2.5 months to go. Things have been a bit tough but then life generally is. The good thing is…I’m not a total waste now. I can actually cook :P

Have to go. Watch this space though….